ROHAN GUNATILLAKE: The function room in the nursing home is really quite nice to be in. The seating is comfy. There is a range of games and books; and is that karaoke equipment? The glass doors at the back open to a well tended garden. Me and my family have come down from Scotland to the South coast of England for a 100th birthday party. We’re a bit early. Richard — my wife Lucy’s grandfather who’s birthday it is — is napping but should be down soon. We pop out to the garden so the kids can run around a bit. Killing time, I add up the collective age of my family. Altogether, we have 96 years across the four of us, just shy of Richard’s century.

Eventually, Richard comes into the room. He may be frail, but he’s sparkling. Still, to honor his energy levels, we’re only able to spend an hour or so with him, but it feels like a real blessing. It’s an hour of cake and gifts and photos and stories. There’s a tradition in the UK, that people who turn 100 receive a card from the monarch. So the card from Charles and Camilla sits proudly on the table with the others. It’s hand-signed and resplendent with a golden tassel. Richard isn’t that impressed (he’s a Diana man), but he knows his late wife would have been giddy about it.

Richard is the first centenarian, the first person to reach 100, that I’ve met. 

And despite being resident in a nursing home, we mustn’t let Richard’s current frailty and now reduced independence fool us. He’s lived a life of energy and adventure. Born in Paris to a toy factory manager father, he went on to serve in the second World War, including time in Syria and the Middle East, then building a family and business life back in the UK, both of which were successful for many decades. 

Richard’s 100 year old life is one full of love, of loss, adventure, friendships, and enterprise. I can’t help but think that if I am able to maintain just a fraction of his intellect, memory, warmth, and humor, which borders upon the devilish much of the time, into the last 10 percent of my own life, then I will be entirely delighted.

So, inevitably, I’ve been reflecting a lot upon age and life, and aging and living. I’ve been imagining life as a progress bar from 1 to 100. 

And in recent times, when I’ve been feeling most sorry for myself, I feel like I’ve peaked, already made my contribution to the world, and that the best of my days are behind me. 

I recognize that many of our capacities decrease as time goes by. But overall, thanks to Richard, I do feel more optimistic about the future. He’s expressed himself through the highs and the lows. Showed determination and what a sense of humor. Anchored in his long past, but still curious about his present. It nudges me to think differently. Instead of thinking about what I’ve done and feeling despondent, I think about what is yet to come, and I feel optimistic. Optimistic about what I might make and do, the people I will love, and the places I may visit. The books I may read. The projects I may start. The projects I may finish. The meditations I might write.

Speaking of which, it’s not that often that inspiration for an entirely new meditation technique strikes, but spending time being with and thinking of Richard has meant exactly that. 

And what I’m going to do is this: I’ll count from years 1 to 100, and do so 10 years at a time. As we progress, I’ll offer some prompts. The invitation here is to watch your mind, watch the thoughts as we travel through time. Watching the mind as you remember events. Watching the mind as things come up. Watch the mind as you pass through your current age and beyond: from the past through the present to the future.

You may have heard of or even done a body scan meditation before. Perhaps you could call this a life scan meditation.

And as ever, please be gentle on yourself. 

Again, just watch the mind, noticing what arises as we move through time. 

Starting from 0 to 10. 

See ourselves as a child. Growing. Learning. Changing.

10-20.

So many developments now. New discoveries. Highs and lows. 

Just noticing what arises. Sensitive to any charge it may have. 

20-30.

Finding our feet in adulthood.

The lessons we learn. Sometimes the hard way.

30-40.

Relationships, experiences you’ve gained.

Relationships and experiences you’re still to gain.

Now to the decade of our going from 40 to 50.

Approaching a half century of life. A half century of learning to be you.

50-60.

Watching what memories come up.

Watching what ideas of who we might be arise.

60-70.

Interested in how we relate to this transitional age.

One where we often move out of work and into retirement.

70-80.

Considering what qualities you might want to express in this decade, if you’re not there already.

How to be as you as possible.

80-90.

Reflecting on the elders in our life who have inspired and taught us.

Remembering what it was about them that was so special.

90-100.

Celebrating the people who make it to this decade.

And that’s us. 100 not out. Thank you Richard for everything.

And thank you. 

And finally, thank you to the wonderful Meditative Story team. We’ve hit our own milestone recently, of 150 episodes. And everyone here is so low key when it comes to stuff like that, but I’m not. So thank you to my colleagues for what you do. As the host, I do get a lot of the credit, but it’s you that do all the real work. You rock.